the twenty third psalm

the Lord is
so far away, obscured is
my shepherd
in the fog, skin all a leper's
i shall not be in want.
i shall not want a damn thing.

God makes me
so confused, God breaks me
to lie down
'cause i can't run, can't fall down
in green pastures, by quiet waters
but my mouth won't open or my tongue unstick.

God restores
the life i'm living for
to my soul
to my uncaring soul
God guides me in paths
too long and full
of righteousness
for God's name's sake.

even though i walk through
i don't talk with you.
the valley of the shadow of Death
is acedia, is forgetting your next breath.
i will fear
only the absence, the vaccuum.
no evil
is unimaginable
for you are with me
and i still feel nothing.
only your rod and your staff
striking my back
i am not comforted.

a table is laid out by God
with my enemies all around
God lays me out,
covered in a banquet,
many evil men feast upon me.
at the head of the table,
the oil is overturned.
the traitor laughs and purs
out wine to follow it.
waste flows down to the floor.
i am unmoved, unfeeling, unable.

surely goodness and love will follow me
but never catch their prey
all the days of my life
will be spent waiting for the hope,
a groom without a wife
surely apathy will swallow me.
and i will dwell in the house
of mirrors, turns and confusions
bored, insecure, unclever
professing that i will stay
resigned
in the house of the Lord forever.
forever